Snowboarding is over. Seriously. It’s time to get your boat ready, start jogging, work on your garden, or whatever it is you do when shred is over. Flowers are blooming, baby robins are chirpin like mad at 5am. It’s spring time son. Hang it up.
Kinda lame i know. I didn’t really get any legit pow days this year either. I got to thinking the other day while swilling down a few with a couple bros…this could be THE worst winter.
Lemme explain: Yeah, we’ve had some snow. But epic northwest pow days? Not really. Yeah, there are parks, and they’ve been fun. But is there a halfpipe? Noooooo (Stevens Pass halfpike doesn’t count).
No pow, no halfpipe. Worst winter ever.
Now before you get your panties all scrunched up i realize that back in 2005 we didn’t even have a winter. Ski areas never even opened or opened for a week and shut back down. Alpentalics everywhere contemplated suicide. You could argue that that was in fact the worst winter ever. But, what you might not recall, is Ski Acres (aka Central) actually had a halfpipe that year. Surrounded by dirt. It was effing rad. You could drive right up to it in your car. People were hauling up BBQ’s and grilling right there!
Photos by Pat Kennedy
How rad would that be if you could still do that? Just roll your sweet van right up there and post up all comfy. Throw some wienies on the grill, maybe a flank or some Morning Star patties for your sissy-hippy friends?! Then go hike the pipe a few, come down have a cold one and some grilled grub? Damn that would be rad…..
But we don’t have that this year. Probably wont ever again. No powder, no halfpipe. Worst season ever.
Really i just need to get my split kit together.
5:38AM txt from UT, “19 Inches overnight”… FML
YESSSSSS!!! This is all coming together well…
UT weekend sounds like my kind of “split kit”
how stoked is that Ciscoe bro… gardners
wow…. never seen that picture, I think that was post knee blow out that same day?? Yeah, I’m gonna start skating now, I don’t even remember how to snowboard after this winter. At least the swells at the coast are starting to point the right way. Could be a decent weekend, have fun in UTAHHHHH. Bring back some powda.
pitty post
do work
cisco is the shit
ya dig?
i’ll be doing work…
IN UTAH this wkend. yes!
definitely not the worst season. there were some nice days here and there. in the last decade 2005 wins.
Season is great here in AK.
plus, snow on the way.
My leggz are outta shape & still sore from the recent storms last week while in mammoth & tahoe. at the same time….8-12 ft swell was men-tal-eyezing the s0-cal coast. I’m ok with that…
hope you score some champagne… but when you get back, sell your shplit bored for left coast serf trip..santa ana winds+south swell is right round ye corner!!
Nearly every person I talk to lately can’t stop complaining about how bad this winter has been. Honestly, I wouldn’t mind, but they’re so fucking insistent that I agree with that perspective. Complaining about the winter of 09/10 has literally become a cultural phenomenon in Seattle. It’s so funny, and strange, I just don’t get it. But I’m trying to understand.
It seems to me like some people are complaining about the season because subconsciously they crave an excuse not to go snowboarding, yeah, maybe they have little things like responsibilities they should be attending to. Who knows, Maybe they’re just tired of the drive. Others might be complaining because hey, if it’s not a powder day they can’t go home and claim how sick it was and how good they got it (to their coworkers, in chat rooms, with witty status updates and pictures on facebook, etc..) You don’t get much of a story out of riding bottom chair groomers, and you can’t use the word Backcountry in a sentence to accentuate how hardcore you are. But hey, I haven’t been hitting any rocks, we’ve got plenty of snow. Maybe we’re just a bunch of spoiled little bitches in Washington
I know I am!
Obviously powder days are fun, but powder days are also fun/legitimate excuses to ignore our adult responsibilities for a little while. This winter, people are complaining because they don’t want to admit that they have other shit they should be doing besides snowboarding. Just because this winter hasn’t been amazing, everyone seems to have come to a consensus that it completely sucks in the mountains. And.. If everyone says it sucks, then nobody feels bad or guilty for not going up. Hey, all you have to do to confirm that it’s a shitty season is drive up and have an uninspired crappy day, then walla! Just like magic, it’s true! It’s sucks, just like everyone says does!
Just a guess, but I bet 85 percent of all Snowboarding related conversations in Seattle Bars in the last 2 months have been about how bad this winter sucks. The other 15% of the conversations were in praise and amazement of Shaun Whites post gold metal run where he threw that excruciatingly ugly double Mctwist 1260. He deserves to be called the flying tomato for that one.
O.k. back to my ridiculously stupid snowboard nerd rant. There’s nothing wrong with skipping out on snowboarding (even on powder days) to do other shit, or to not do shit at all! You don’t have to complain about the conditions not being epic to justify why you’re not going up all the time. Who cares, there’s nothing to feel guilty about Seattleites. Fuck it, you partied last night, you feel like shit, kick back, eat some cheetos and watch a movie! Go post long boring meaningless comments about absolutely nothing on the internet like I’m doing right now! Take a break from all that driving (especially after driving out to the beach all summer and fall). You don’t have to whine about the conditions when there’s still enough snow to have a good time. Just say to yourself “groomed runs and park jumps would be fun, but for some reason, today I really don’t give a fuck.
”
Ever see that footage of Nicolas Muller riding those groomer width strips of snow at his local area, doing handplants on 8 inch curbs of snow? Looked like he was having fun. Or see the hill in Talma, Finland Jussi Oksanen grew up riding? Go buy and sit through the Airblaster movie ‘December’ if you want some perspective on how good this season is.
Obviously, If there’s enough snow to ride there’s most likely enough snow to have fun. Ski school kids still know that. Didn’t anybody snowboard when they were kids? Remember when your school schedule dictated when you could ride, not the conditions. Doesn’t anybody remember how fun cruising groomed runs was and still is? Didn’t anybody ever get amped to go night riding in the rain after school? What? Can’t tap into that kind of stoke because of all those great powder days you’ve got under your belt. The conditions haven’t been that bad (that’s just a matter of perspective), we’re just getting old and there ain’t nothin’ wrong with that ( Well except for all the bitching we do to deny it.) By the way, have fun in Utah Drex.
Well said Old Guy. I appreciate your optimism.
I’ve been having a blast riding park this year. The triple jump line at Ski Acres has been fun and the Stevens Park has been super fun too. They had a fun pipe even though the left wall is L shaped instead of J.
It is all about perspective. I think you hit it right on with suggesting people do other things on a pow day rather than ride and not feel bad about it.
Utah was fun. Brighton was so fun. Expedia f-ed me so bad….
Old Guy wins the longest comment award.
I like That Old Guy. Ha.
great words/rant Old Guy, spot on
Thats a lot of words.. and I have to be honest.. I am not reading all of them.. but I think I agree with everything there
ski school, maaan my mom would only pay for me to ski, not snowboard, so I didnt go.. now I smoke pot and snowboard.. who’s fault is that mom??? Probably wouldn’t be doing that if I got on the ski school bus with the good kids and created strong healthy lifelong bonds with them.. instead I ended up with the dirts and couches, some Canadian…. Now I hate on all the ski school kids and break their toilet seats while they sleep
spoiled pussies go do work
hope there is a fresh Utah report in the future… I saw a kid get clobbered by a snowmobile this weekend, knocked him out, two grown men crying.. med kits dont help unless there are lacerations, cuts and stuff… hair ball out there
Everything Is Everything. Most people confuse snowboarding with capital-S Snowboarding. Always have, always will. Me and Hambone been walking around in the rain on our splitboards this season, laughing our asses off…that's been great.
Old Guy* has most of it right, except the Topic Of Seattle Snowboarder Bar Conversations: that shit is ALWAYS about pretending to be a sarfer LOLOL
-A
*ps how "old" are you claiming to be, if you were on ski bus with a snowboard? LISTEN HERE YUNGBUCK I WAS THERE WHEN THEY TOLD MY MOM THAT I COULDNT BE ON THE SKI BUS ANYMORE BECAUSE I RODE A SNOWBOARD OKAY? NO SNOWBOARDS AT ALPENTAL ON WEEKENDS, REMEMBER THAT? OLD GUY? I DO.
BOOM YOU JUST BEEN OUT-OLDED. PROPS TO BEANDIP, NECTAR SNOWBOARDS, AND BREAKING THE WINDOW AT THE DOOR OF GOTCHA GRIND WITH SKATEBOARDS WHILST WEARING RED KEDS.
did you just try to out old me? you wiley little piece of dog shit stain on your moms beard… Dude I turn 38 I think, real soon.. I was wishing I had a snowboard while you were still sucking on your mammys tites, ya dig? I can out old you anyday hoss, bring it
that would only work if sman was Old Guy, which I can tell he's not…so suckit swappah and I win
Go to bed you r drunk.
hahaha "wiley little piece of dog shit stain on your moms beard" thats nast.